A Nice Evening with My Husband’s Daughter

by childless stepparent

My husband is sometimes out of town for work on weeks when his daughter is with her mom; when that happens, he asks me to cover his “visit night.” It makes him happy to know his daughter and I are enjoying time together. Also, it’s important to him to keep her schedule as consistent as possible, and I am glad to support that.

Yesterday, I picked her up at school and answered emails while she played with her friends on the playground. Then we went to her piano lesson – always a treat for me because I adore her piano teacher. Then an early dinner at my favorite vegetarian restaurant in town. My husband’s daughter is a picky eater, and I encourage her to try new things. We ordered off the tapas menu and she found something she liked. We had fun together, enjoying the delicious organic food and the gorgeous ambiance – a waterfall cascading down the wall, candles on our table, waiters in crisp white aprons, the chef bringing our plates to our table.

Then off to the Shambhala center where we meditated for a little while in the shrine room. So beautiful and peaceful; my husband has been bringing his daughter there for years. It’s important that she learn how to find that quiet space inside herself. We left just as they were beginning the evening chant.

We had another hour before her mom was due to pick her up, so we dropped in the local bookstore cafe and enjoyed hot chocolate and pastries while my stepdaughter finished her homework.

Part of what I can bring my husband’s daughter is a sense of how to carry herself in refined environments. It’s not something she was exposed to before I came along, and it’s something I enjoy – so I’m glad to share it with her.

Manifesto #6 | I will be kind to my stepchild. I will support my husband in his role as her dad. I will contribute – on my own terms.