Find Balance Between Exertion and Relaxation

by childless stepparent


My teacher, Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche, talks about how we can find balance between exertion – what he calls “delightful diligence” – and relaxation. He teaches us how to find that lightness in our meditation – it can be applied to everything we do. Delightful diligence, relaxation, delightful diligence, relaxation.

One of my favorite yoga teachers, John Friend, talks about finding that space, too, in our yoga practice. He invites us to give our full heart to our pose – to “open to grace” – and then to back off, just a tiny little bit. When we find ease in our effort, our yoga pose (asana) becomes effortless, light, truly balanced.

In that place – balanced between exertion and relaxation – we find steadiness, awareness, alignment, presence.

That’s what I’m practicing today. In my asana. In my sitting practice. In the moment my husband walked in the door with his daughter, who’s been with her mom and is back with us this week.

I’m not trying too hard with my husband’s daughter (which I often do) or backing off completely (which I sometimes do). I’m watching my husband with his daughter. His ease, the way he loves her and gives her space. I’m finding that ease without trying.

I’m stepping back. Breathing. Letting go.